magic.rox

Last Saturday evening, my father and I went to the Murat Centre to see one of my most favorite comedians, Lewis Black.

It was my first time visiting the Murat, and the first time my father and I had seen Lewis.

He is most known for his “rant” style of comedy.  For those who know my father, they are very similar as he loves to rant about my step-brother.

I have attempted over the past several days to embed clips from YouTube of Lewis, but for some reason can’t, so I will leave links to my favorite clips.

Here he is at the 2007 emmys:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UFYhupmhhBw  I know the producers of a certain show will enjoy this clip tremendously.

He often speaks about politics, but his set didn’t have much to do with it this time, even though it was only few days away from election day.  His main message:  Santa for President in ‘08!  I know it may be shocking, but it has some merit behind it.  Lewis said, “None of the current canidates for president have the one qualification needed, joining the republican and democratic party’s to attain goals.”  I believe him.

This clip is the beginning of the set he performed for us (minus the helicopter):  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HUCxoeGZ_Js

There was one hiccup, as confetti speraticly fell from the catwalk above the stage.  It diverted the audiences’ attention from Lewis and the other comedian.  In a moment of frustration, Lewis said he would track down Sammy Hagar, who was the previous performer there.  He would then put S*** on top of his stage to fall on him.  It was a moment of pure angst.  Somewhat similar to the clip above.

Lewis is also famous for his part on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart.  He has a segment that airs from time to time called, “Back in Black.”  I love it!  Here’s a clip:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T4SDQu7Izrk

All in all, I think he’s as cutting edge as George Carlin was in the 70’s.  I can’t wait to see him again.

Last night I received a call from my daughters mother.  Taylor had a seizure!

I was almost certain this was over, when she was around 1 she had a few seizures.

This brought me into an immediate depression with thoughts that I had passed it to her via my DNA.  I was assured by the doctor’s that since I was not born with epilepsy, I could not pass it to my children.  I’m starting to doubt that.

There are 2 events that occurred that could have actually given Taylor an impact to her brain to eventually cause epilepsy.  When her mom was 3 months pregnant with her, she had a bad car accident.  She broke her ankle and did a number on her nose.  Her car was turned into a V shape.  Then, when Taylor was a few months old an incident occured with my mother.  My mother was watching her for the day, she went and got some groceries and upon her return to home, placed Taylor on the counter in her car seat.  Taylor proceeded to rock a little bit, and she fell to the floor, face first.  She had a black eye that just made you cry.

Taylor had a few seizures a few months after the 2nd incident occurred.

There are some strange coincidences around this though.  Both my sister and I have epilepsy, and it started around the same age.  In both cases it has been contributed to blows to the head, but it can’t be proven to the Nth degree.

I hope my daughter doesn’t have to go through this horrible condition.  I believe it makes you a better person inside, but nobody wants their children to go through things such as these.

Hang in there Tator Bug.  Daddy loves you.

 

UPDATE:  I uploaded the Vamipress picture to the Herald-Times website and it’s on there! 

Since my child is a girl, she has mainly wanted to be “cute” things.  This year was a departure on that theme.  She recently dyed her hair a bright red, and decided to be a Vampiress.  I must say I think she pulled off the scary part quite well from the pictures I have seen.

She has been an M&M, an Angel, a Kitty, and a Pretty Witch on previous Halloweens.  This has been the first Halloween I have been apart from my daughter.  Her mother and I have always tried to make a point to go out with her trick or treating.  This year was impossible with the distance between us.  I’m sure it was great though.

You should be proud Taylor, as a Vampire was my favorite thing to be on Halloween!  I love you and miss you sweetheart.

I have this strange feeling of pride and sadness.  Every year, my daughter enters different stages of life that make me love her even more.  This is one big step in my eyes.  The sadness you ask?  When she isn’t my little girl anymore

As a special day in my life, today being my birthday, I have thought about some of the events that have occured in my life that have made me, well, me.

Here is a summation of my life thus far, all 27 years of it.

October 25th, 1980 - I was born at the Bloomington Hospital.  I have heard stories how I was trouble from the word go, as I was a breech baby.

Summer 1985 - I ran away from a daycare center and walked a couple of miles down 3rd street to The Crescent Doughnut Shop.  After having some doughnut holes and a sprite on the house, I was taken back to the center by Monroe County Sheriff’s Deputies.  My family was upset, but I got to ride in a police car.  The main thing I remember is what I was singing in my head on that hot day, “On the road again,” by Willie Nelson.  The Herald-Telephone, now called The Herald-Times had a story about the situation which mentioned new fangled tracking devices for kids at the time, it’s currently used for pets.

Summer 1986 - A hearing-impaired neighbor told my dad about me stealing a cigarette from his truck.  So I rode my bike all the way to my memma’s house, which was almost a 10 mile ride.  Not bad for a 5 year old.

Labor Day 1987 - My just divorced father marries Kathy Howe.  This starts a period of darkness for me.  I become a bully in school.  She physiclly and mentally abuses me, even wants to charge me rent to live in “her” home.  It all culminates in 1992 with an altercation with a rifle, she threatened to shoot me and I dared her.  Just as I was trying to remove the weapon from her hands my father showed up and held me down to calm down the situation.  I immediately moved in with my mother, who had been in Lubbock, Texas for several years.

October 1992 - I bring a BB gun to Templeton Elementary School with plans to at least hurt everyone in the 6th grade class, and the principal.  After making it on the grounds I chickened out and hid it in a bush.  The BB gun was found and I was expelled and put on probation.  I was passed on to 7th grade with only 2 months of 6th grade education.

1993 - 1995 - Those were very trying years for me.  I learned to appreciate many things we all take for granted.  Most of the time I didn’t know where I would sleep for the evening.  My mom’s husband was on the run from the law and I was abandoned in a trailer by Lake Monroe.  I did not have any electricty, running water or heat.  Sometimes I ate, sometimes I didn’t.  Once I got a hold of my father, things got better.

1996 - In the middle of the night I stole my mothers car (which was soon to by mine when I received my license), and her money, packed my clothes and took off.  My destination, Round Rock, Texas.  I was on-line, a new and expensive thing at that time.  I met a girl via a BBS named Metropolis.  She and I talked for hours upon hours, on the computer and on the phone.  Her username was “Swisser.”  Everyone had thought I drove to Valpo to see another girl, but that was just a ploy.  After driving 20 hours straight due to an error on my part, I ended up at my aunt Beth’s house in Westville, Oklahoma.  She immediately called my dad.  They decided that I stay with my grandfather until something could be worked out.  I spent a week with him, and I will always cherish that time I had with him.  I was the only grandchild he really knew.  He passed away in 2000.

November 1996 - I have a seizure while bagging groceries at the westside Kroger.  Later that month after a battery of tests, I’m diagnosed with epilepsy.  I don’t realize for years what responsibilities this condition carries.

October 1997 - I drop out of high school for good.  After being bounced around the 3 high schools in the county, I was lost.  The same day I dropped out, I took the General Education Diploma test.  After nervously waiting, I passed and received my GED.  I only went to high school 1 and a half years.

November 1997 - One month after purchasing a 1992 Dodge Daytona, I totalled it and shut down Highway 37 for 4 hours by running it into a propane tank at an estimated speed of 60mph.  I was unconscious almost from the time I left my home in Ellettsville to after the collision.  Fortunately I was unharmed.  This collision makes me reconsider driving with my condition.  It also shoots my insurance rates to over $1000 every 6 months.  It is now affordable, only 10 years later.

August 26, 1999 - I become a father!  Weighing in at 7 pounds, 11 ounces, Taylor Marie Nicole Lawmaster is born.  Two years later, her mother and I split up.  As an afterthought, my daughters’ own name was a sign.  We couldn’t agree on a middle name, so she has 2.  Her mother wanted Marie, and I wanted Nicole.

2001 - Life is coming more into focus.  I start a job I have been applying to for 3 years, Baxter.  I thought I would work their until I retired but was canned after 5 years.  I also meet someone very special, Rachel Christine Lee.  I didn’t know or even think at that moment, but she would soon enough be my wife.  We also met on-line.

2002 - Rachel and I move in together on Valentine’s day.  We start with nothing, not even a bed.  Eventually our apartment is overflowing with the love we have for each other and furnishings.

2004 - After years of almost no control of my seizures, I have a VNS (Vagal Nerve Stimulator) implanted.  It eventually works better than any medication I have ever taken at controlling seizures.  I also get married at the First Baptist Church in Bedford, Indiana.  The same church where my parents were married in 1981.

2006 - Rachel and I become homeowners.  It’s an ongoing adventure that I can’t get enough of.  Three months later I become unemployed, which scares the bejesus out of us.  This starts a period of unknown for the both of us, when will it end?  I really don’t know.

2007 - I started a new job at IU, which might open some doors for me.

Here’s my history, what’s yours?

Over the past year, I’ve forgotten how much mental energy an office job takes.  My stamina has long gone away.  Most of this week, I have been exhausted by this new job.  I’m not complaining, just explaining.

We have been “address cleaning,” as it’s called.  To put it in layman’s terms, we are sent database tables which have names, addresses, citys, states and zipcodes.  Sometimes they have more information, such as a student ID numbers or e-mail addresses.

The purpose of address cleaning is to format the addresses to the USPS standard, which can be very interesting if you haven’t had to do that before.  Did you know that there is a way to shorten almost every street name, IE drive, road, lane, etc.?

The tiring part is these tables, some were as small as 300 entries, but others were as large as 6800!  When we thought we were done, they were checked, and the remaining errors were shown to us.  Nothing bad, just constructive criticism.

Thursday night after work we went and picked up Taylor in Louisville, Ky.  My mom helped us out and took a half day off of work and drove to Clarksville, TN to pick her up.  They then drove back to Louisville where we met at her house.  We then had to drive back home so I could make it back to work in the morning.  We left as soon as we left work, and got back home around 11ish.

Lets just say I was of no use to anyone on Friday, and luckily my new job is very flexible and I was able to work only 6 hours.

So today I am doing some home remodeling and it goes much smoother with my lil helper!  I’m re-installing our stair hand rails to a much more comfortable position, with new hardware.  And I’m patching the rest of the holes in the drywall.  We also picked out our paint colors, which hopefully will be done before Thanksgiving.

Yesterday we spent a wonderful evening with my brother and sister in-law.  She works at the IRT (Indianapolis Repertory Theatre). One of her benefits is free tickets to each show.  Last night it was Our Town.  I have to say it was quite moving.  The play revolves around life and death in a little town named Grover’s Corners.  The cast was great, I really enjoyed the performance by the “Stage Manager.”  If you haven’t seen the show professionally done, please do so.  It’s one of the best shows I think I’ve seen.

 

We then capped the evening off with dinner and drinkx at the Oaken Barrel.  A nice microbrew pub/restaraunt.  It makes me think of Btown’s own Upland in a way.

Rachel and her sister got to do a lot of talking, as sisters often do.  I believe a lot of issues on their minds were finally resolved. 

We haven’t had a night out with them in around 2 years.  I hope we can do it more often.

I miss my little girl every day she’s not here with me.

Daddy misses you Taylor!

Slowly, I have started scanning old pictures that have been taken of my family.  Something just draws me to do this, and I enjoy it.  I found many surprises on my first venture at my grandma Lawmaster’s last Saturday.

Take a look and see what I found!

Here is the only “full” Lawmaster family picture that I know of.  It was taken around 1984.  I’m the one in the blue suit on the left side of the bottom row.

I found this picture hidden underneath my uncle’s senior picture.  At first I didn’t even know who this was.  I had to ask my grandma about this one.  It’s HER senior picture, circa 1938!  I also found her baby picture, a pure treasure.

I hope to make more trips on a regular basis and eventually scan every picture my grandparents have.  Then it’s my fathers’ stuff, if he can find anything.  I do have his super-8 films to transfer as well.

 
If you’re in Bloomington, and decide to go to the Fun Frolic.  DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT play the “win a bunny game.”

We did, and are now proud parents to a 7 week old bunny, we decided to name Gillham or Gil for short.  Gillham is the name of the street we live on.

I must admit, he is quite adorable.  What’s even better is how he doesn’t have a care in the world for the cats!  He sniffs and goes on.  It’s quite amazing since the cats are at least 3 times his size.

We are going to take the responsible adult approach and “try” caring for him as a pet.  If it becomes too much to handle we might find a better home for him.  He is in a much better home than he was at the Fun Frolic at this point.  The poor bunnys were being kept outside in the mid 90’s humid heat.

We are mainly keeping him in a cage right now, at least once a day we are letting him out into a controlled environment.  I’ve read that this is best for younger bunnies, to give them their freedom in slow increments.  It is also important for them to feel loved, but not man-handled.

It’s been a long time since I last posted.  Part of me feels bad for leaving it abandoned for so long, I wouldn’t even have this if it weren’t for the kindness of Editor B.

Since starting my new job, I have felt “disconnected.”  My life has been connected to computers and technology since I was a teenager and I haven’t had the time to enjoy my computer much lately.  I cannot access computers while at work

Many things have happened since then, so I will update.  Hang on, cause there is much to say.

My daughter has officially graduated 1st grade, and left the state.  She took my heart with her.  With the help of my wife (thanks Rach) we made her a goodbye present.  A DVD filled with a slideshow with pictures of her and everyone who loves her.  It also included video of many of her loved ones saying goodbye and giving some life lessons.

I’ll miss you sweetheart!

My video business has suddenly picked up.  I am now more busy than not with projects people are wanting me to do for them.  I am going to advertise for the first time as well.  It also helps out high schoolers so I say why not?  I have also added a new service:  Cassette tape to CD or MP3 transfers! 

Work has been crazy.  I have been pushed to a point where I no longer think of it as a possible career anymore, just a job.  I am treated like scum, which is also what I clean.  With the heat and humidity, I can barely stand it.  Just like a few of my co-workers.

My little sister has moved in with us for a couple of weeks.  Her lease was up, and she has a new place lined up.  It’s just a matter of timing until she gets in.

We have picked up the pace on house projects.  Over the last few weekends we have removed the hideous wallpaper around our home.

Interestingly enough, underneath all of this were drawings.  These drawings were made by the children who lived here at the time.  We only have the kitchen and Taylor’s room to go.  Currently I am prepping the walls for paint.  We need them to be as perfect as possible for the deep, rich tones we have decided on for paint.

I also installed a new light fixture in our dining room.  We found a beautiful set for the dining room and foyer areas.  The one for the foyer has 2 tiers and is much larger.  Installation will be a different story though, as the ceiling is 1 1/2 stories high.

I cut down the dead tree in our backyard, that was fun!  I haven’t done that in over 10 years!  I have cleaned up much of it, but there is a lot more to go.  I am saving as much as possible for firewood, as I would like to use my fireplace sometime.

I wrecked my truck:(

The damage isn’t bad, just the bumper and a side piece to it.  I was returning from mowing at work, and while backing up jack-knifed my trailer.  It’s easy to do with a trailer that’s so small you can’t see it behind you.  And it just happens that my neighbors grandson just wrecked his truck which is essientially the same as mine.  It’s totalled, but the bumper is good!  I spoke with him today and I might get a new bumper on the cheap!

Hopefully once a few things settle down, I can start posting more often.

We all love this picture of Taylor and Sully from Monsters, INC.  She was very excited to meet him, and he even scared a few people.  This is one part of the trip she really enjoyed, meeting characters from her favorite movies.

After what I can only describe as a “grueling” 16 hour drive, we are here.  Travelling at speeds ranging from 80 to 110mph, was quite interesting.

Here we are arriving at our hotel

Our first days’ adventures were Disney’s Animal Kingdom and Epcot.  Taylor really enjoyed meeting all the characters at Animal Kingdom.

The wireless at the hotel isn’t that swell, so this will be my only post on the trip.  I just thought I would post this for all who are interested.

Tommorow’s schedule:  MGM Studios and back to Epcot.

Tonight, my daughter had a musical program at her school.  It included the entire 1st grade class.  The name of the program?  Bugz, and each child was one.

There were ladybugs, army ants, butterflys, a praying mantis, a stinkbug and a maggot.  My daughter was a beautiful butterfly.

I recieved some news while at this program.  It has been announced where my daughter will be moving, Ft. Cambell, KY.

It is the closest solution possible, which should be good news.  I’m just not taking it well.  Was it the fact that I was “stuck in the middle” of 2 very strong personalities? (my ex and my wife)  Or was it that I am so tired of this job and can’t wait for this vacation?

Anyways, I enjoyed seeing my daughter up on stage having fun with her soon to be ex-classmates.

The teachers are fun to look at too! :)  Especially my daughters’ teacher, Mrs. P

My lovely daughter, will more than likely be moving away from me in around 3 months.

When I was first told of this, I took it in stride.  Now is a different story.  Since I have to work on the weekends (when I generally have my daughter) I don’t get to spend the quality time I used to with her.  That’s all she really wants.

2 of the nights I work, I am alone.  I’m all alone right now.  I could be washing a tractor or trailer, but I’m not.  I’m contemplating my life right now.

I don’t know how much I could go on about how I’m pissed off at the “system.”  My hands are tied when it comes to anything regarding keeping her here.  I try to think of myself as a good parent, but I have my self doubts.

Through what my daughter tells me, the environment she has at home is not kind to her.  She thrives on attention and participating in creative endavors.  I like to call her my “little helper.”  She enjoys helping me around the house.  She even helped me with demolition of my garage.  It makes her feel like she’s a part of something, that’s one thing she doesn’t feel when she’s at home.  She just feels in the way.

I was raised in a similar situation and I really feel for her. 

She had a cat named “Polkadots,” her stepdad didn’t like Polkadots, so he went out a bought a dog to scare her away.  Which worked.  This theme seems to run it’s course through every aspect of my daughters life lately.

I’m not trying to blame here, nothing I say or do will change the end result.  Ever since I met her stepdad, I think he felt threatened by me.  Until he left for basic training, I couldn’t even talk with my daughters’ mom alone.  Now he will just have an inflated ego because he’s in the army.

Part of me feels that she would be better off to stay with us until her stepdad and mom get the big picture.  When you have children, your wants and some of your needs become secondary to theirs.  I don’t want to start that argument though.

I hope our upcoming vacation to Disney World will show Taylor that she is loved, and will always be loved by her daddy and Rachel.  I am starting to work on a present to give to her before she leaves.

This is hurting me worse than any thing I can imagine.  Compounded by the problem that I cannot fix it, I can only deal with it. 

We are officially planning our spring break vacation now.  Since my daughter has told me that she didn’t really enjoy her recent trip to Oklahoma, we have decided to do something we know she will enjoy.

Rachel and Taylor have not been to Florida.  I haven’t been since I was 9ish.  That was a horrible vacation, as it was bone chilling cold (for Florida anyway), roads were closed, hell Disney and all the other resorts were closed most of the time we were there. 

We haven’t worked out all the details yet, but we are going to the Orlando area.  That is solid as a rock right now.  Hopefully I can borrow my mom’s car again (more room is a plus), Thanks mom!  The next step is figuring out a way to get to NOLA from there.

I have been yearning to meet Editor B & XY for a while now.  I feel as if this may be an opportunity that I do not want to miss out on.  I think a day or 2 wouldn’t be too much to ask, as we are staying in Orlando for 3.

I guess I’ll see how this turns out.

I have always been a fan of the arts.  Whether it be performing, creative, or without a title.  One problem is that I do not have many “pieces” of art.  I purchased a print while in Oklahoma many years ago.  It was created by Ben Adair Shoemaker.  The artwork itself and the artists’ name struck a cord deep within my soul, as my family lives in Adair county, Oklahoma.

I feel as if I might start on a new path with art due to an article I read in the Herald Times.  My favorite writer (except J of course) has always been Mike Leonard.  He always writes very interesting things, about interesting subjects.

In his latest article, he wrote about a recent meeting with John Mellencamp.  As you may or may not know, John is also an accomplished artist.  John recently completed a 10′ x 10′ painting, and asked Mike if he’d buy it.

I have been a fan of Johns’ work, both music and painting since I have known about them.  I would like to have a piece of his, but have not been able to find a way to do so.  Hopefully, with Mr. Leonard’s help, I will have a chance.

I emailed Mike asking if he knew someone to contact regarding purchasing a painting from John.  He replied stating he would contact John’s manager.  I hope things pan out.

-Interesting note:  My mother auditioned to be a backup singer for John back in the early to mid 80’s.  From what she has told me, everyone loved her voice, she was just too tall.

 

My mom is 6′ tall.

The only questions are why and where, everything else is covered! 

I have been contenplating travelling to New Orleans, LA for 2 reasons.¬† Number one, to finally meet “Editor B & XY”, number 2, to go to Mardi Gras for the first time.

Since my life has been nothing but a mess lately, I’m unsure if my wife and I will be able to make this journey.¬† Which pains me so.

My wife “claims”¬†she has¬†never been¬†to Florida, even though many know she has been :p¬† So now the plan, I think, is to have a longer spring break trip.¬† We would¬†visit Daytona Beach and Tallahasee, and end our trip with I’m sure a great time in New Orleans.

I am way overdue for a long road trip.¬† My father and I haven’t been able to¬†take our annual weekend Oklahoma trip,(Imagine driving 10 hours to¬†say HI, do you have a place I can sleep, and leaving in the morning)¬†which is great time for the 2 of us to spend quality time together.¬† I must admit, I have never “been” to the “deep south.”¬† I’ve driven through ‘bama and Georgia, but never stayed.¬† Just the thought excites me.

Travelling has always been more about the journey than the destination to me.¬† Don’t get me wrong, I always love where I go, I just enjoy viewing the amazing¬†sights our country has to offer us¬†on the open road.¬† I guess it’s a guy thing?, cuz the wife does not get it at all.